Archive for the ‘Skills, Interests & Values’ Category

A journalist for the Associated Press, who was writing an article on the topic of refining your skills when you’re unemployed, interviewed me today.

Apparently, she was inspired to write the article after reading the statistic that over 14% of Americans are underemployed. I guess she was wondering about the possible link between being underemployed and one’s skills being rusty.

I think that underemployment has a lot to do with individuals minimizing their abilities or assuming they have to take what they can get for work, especially in this tight job market. Either way, you can end up settling for something less than you may be able to tackle or snag.

In regards to the topic of keeping skills sharp, the first step is to identify the skills that are in demand for your target job(s) and then determine the best way to build on or refine the competencies you already have.

Beyond the obvious options of enrolling in classes at a local adult education program or university, there are other ways to stay on top of your game. Here are a few examples:

Enroll in a certificate-yielding program in a university or college’s continuing education program

Attend seminars and workshops offered by your professional association (These days many associations offer a reduced rate or waive the registration fee for meetings altogether for unemployed individuals.)

Hire a tutor to help you refine your second language skills or learn the in-demand software to update your computer skills.

Check out your local Career Center to determine what relevant workshops they may offer.

Regularly review events calendars for the Chambers of Commerce and community organizations listed online and in print to see what they might be featuring.

Keep in contact with professionals in the fields you have targeted. They are the best source of current and accurate information about the skills and competencies needed to get the job done and, therefore, which ones to focus on in networking and during a job interview.

A colleague recently sent me an article by author and educational activist, “http://www.couragerenewal.org/parker” Parker Palmer, titled “ “http://www.yesmagazine.org/article.asp?ID=419” Now I Become Myself.” It was an easy, but interesting read, since it presented ideas that I espouse and often share with clients in my “http://barbarababkirk.com/” career counseling practice.

Essentially, Palmer writes that we spend the first half of our lives abandoning our essential talents and true nature in quests for approval and ill-fated attempts to establish ourselves in the world.

The sense of a “lost self” increases with age and reveals itself in career and work choices that don’t align with who we are meant to be. That could certainly contribute to the high incidence of dissatisfaction in the workplace.

It is predictably at midlife and beyond that we find this discrepancy unacceptable and set out to reclaim “the person we’ve always been.”

“What is my purpose?” or “How do I discover my passion?” are questions that underscore an effort to reconnect with a forgotten aspect of ourselves.

Even with the most formidable question and sincerest desire, there is no guarantee of an immediate answer. It is our work in the second half of life to retrace our life’s path to recognize the truths about ourselves that have been present all along.

Palmer recounted that as a child, he spent hour upon hour drawing and creating airplanes out of paper, then fashioning them into books. One might conclude from his pastime that Palmer was destined to become an aviator or aeronautical engineer.

But, in retrospect, Palmer, an accomplished writer who has written seven books, realized that his real passion was for creating books, rather than for flying (at least in the literal sense of the word).

Palmer’s story invites us to reflect on our own lives to find clues about our true nature and passions. In making connections beyond the obvious, with what we’ve done and who we are, we may uncover gems that reflect true facets of ourselves.

These treasures can provide the precious clues that reveal who we are meant to be.

Though I did not know exactly why I was going or what would come of it, I knew months ago that I would spend this past weekend in Annapolis at a seminar featuring poet and international lecturer, “http://davidwhyte.bigmindcatalyst.com/cgi/bmc.pl?page=home.html&node=1015” David Whyte.

While I knew that Maryland would be heralding spring while here in Maine it still looked like deep winter, and that I could always use the CEU’s for my counseling license, I had an intuitive hunch that another reason might emerge as the real explanation for my attendance.

The lecture hall at “http://www.stjohnscollege.edu/” St. John’s College was filled with anticipation when David addressed participants with his engaging and unique style of using poetry to inform and guide his audience through life’s challenges. The theme of the weekend was “Exploring the Paradox: Navigating Through Life’s Transitions”, and David did not waste any time diving into the topic. Reciting words from Yeats, Shakespeare and his own poems, David presented us with moving examples of the essential tension we hold in our lives between safety and risk, love and grief and control and letting go.

All this was fascinating and informative. But it was this provocative question that moved me in a way I was not expecting. “What are you not experiencing in your life because of your focused attention on those things that make you feel in control or safe?

This question piqued my curiosity and imagination. While journaling and conversing with other participants, I realized that a shift had occurred within me. I found that I more fully understood that which theologian and author  “http://www.careofthesoul.net/” Thomas Moore referenced when he said “Deep changes follow shifts in the imagination.”

I’m not at all clear how this shift will actually play out in my life, but like the Annapolis seminar, it will be just the right experience.

Here are some questions I’d like to pass on to you from the seminar:

What need to control or fear is keeping your from a new and different life experience?

When and how were you last inspired to change some aspect of your life?

How could your imagination help you to expand or shift your perspective on something you desire?

Is there a stack of work-related articles, books or professional journals grabbing dust instead of your attention? Could they indicate how disengaged you feel about your career and hint of a change you need to make; or are they an indication of healthy work and life boundaries?

What you choose to do in your off-work time says something important about you, your priorities and your interests.

Imagine you were out and with an afternoon all to yourself. If you wandered into a fabulous bookstore, where would you roam in the course of a few hours? What section of books would get your attention and which topics would you take with you to an overstuffed chair for a relaxing or stimulating read?

If you imagined yourself in the bookstore with the New York Times bestsellers, Steven King’s latest thriller or books on home improvement, it could be a sign of a healthy work life balance, rather than an indication of a need for a new job. However, if anything remotely work-related makes you cringe, then consider what’s behind your response.

When you love your work, you’re typically interested to know the latest in your field and want to find the time to include it in your life.

What Would Make You Love Your Job?

I hope that this question caused you to pause and reflect, because your response could be key to your happiness and satisfaction at work.

If you are among the majority of Americans, you do not love your work. However, you can change this.

You may have become complacent or tolerant of work that no longer satisfies you. Unable to see a way out or hope for change, you may have become resigned to your situation.

But, you can decide otherwise.

First of all, consider whether there are any conditions under which you’d love your current job. If you are hard pressed to come up with any, then the handwriting may be on the wall. You’d probably be better off in another position, company or career. But which is it? That’s an important distinction to make and the following scenarios might help you:

If you enjoy working for your employer, but don’t feel challenged or engaged in your work, then assuming new responsibilities or a different position might reengage you. Talk with your boss about where you could add value or how your job description could be modified to better suit your current interests and skills set.

If you enjoy your responsibilities, but not necessarily your co-workers, supervisor, or work environment, then the grass may in fact be greener with another employer. As you investigate the options in another company or organization, keep in mind the specific questions you should ask to avoid going from the frying pan into the fire.

If you are no longer interested in the overall subject matter of your field and cringe at the thought of reading a professional journal or work-related book, then perhaps it’s time to imagine a new career direction. You may even have a few ideas in mind. If that’s true, then take time to investigate these possibilities. But, remember, you don’t have to commit to anything before you know it’s the right direction.

Life is short…Live your life. Love your work.

Typically, topics for my blogs come from clients, colleagues or professional writings. However, my inspiration this time came from friends sharing their good counsel as I prepare for my daughter’s upcoming wedding.

“Keep perspective, remember what matters most, and have a great time”, is the advice from those whose wisdom I value most.”

It occurred to me that this message has relevance beyond wedding planning, to many of life’s milestones, including the transition to new work.

Here’s how this advice might apply to someone in the job search:

Keep perspective. Your world can become very small and narrowly focused when you are seeking a new job. Waiting for the invitation for an interview, a job offer, or a response to your résumé submission, you might become overly focused, even a bit obsessed about the prospective employer. Resist the tendency to conjure up reasons why he or she is not contacting you in a timely manner and shift your attention to those things over which you have some control. Remind yourself that while your job search is first and foremost on your mind, it is hardly the same for the employer.

Remember what matters most. When you begin to evaluate your job options, know what you most value. Consider past work experiences, what was lacking and what you appreciated as you formulate a list of “must haves”. Recognize how work fits into your overall life and know what’s important in order for your life to work well and feel somewhat balanced.

Have a great time. This may be a stretch when you are counting the weeks until your final paycheck or feel miserable in a job you want to leave. But, this advice may be just what you need in order to move forward in a better frame of mind. Take time to do something enjoyable, like walk the beach or have lunch with a friend. Don’t let a negative mindset or worrisome thoughts get the upper hand. Stay focused on the outcome you desire and engage in activities that will bolster your spirits.

There are many reasons why people become disenchanted with their work. While a desire for increased compensation or more challenge can prompt regular visits to the classifieds, it rarely has the impact of an ethical or values-related conflict.

While there is little empirical information on the actual effects of ethical conflicts in the workplace on job performance, at a minimum, a person will be distracted from the job at hand. At the other end of the spectrum, a person may experience physical symptoms such as regular headaches or gastrointestinal problems as they become more and more aware of the issue with which they are at odds.

Since ethical or values conflicts vary greatly in scope and content, I’ll keep this blog focused on strategy rather than on specific examples. Over the years, I’ve met with dozens of people who experienced values-related dilemmas and they were often at a loss as to what to do about it short of resigning.

Ignoring it is not effective or sustainable. Once a conflict has your attention, there is no turning your back on it or sweeping it under the proverbial rug, as much as you might like to faun ignorance, it’s too late for that.

So, what do you do instead of retreating from your situation? First, clarify the issue. Write down your thoughts to help you understand your circumstance and your feelings about it. You might begin by writing responses to the following questions:

• What is the ethical conflict I have observed or experienced?
• What is so troublesome about this for me?
• How is this conflict affecting me physically and emotionally?
• Where in my body do I especially feel this conflict? (e.g. tightness in my shoulders, knot in my stomach…)
• What is my part in this conflict? How have I contributed to my own feelings and situation?
• What might alleviate this feeling? (Allow yourself to go inward to find your response to this one.)
• What additional information do I need to help me understand the whole of this conflict?
• With whom might I speak about this who could be objective? (It might be best to consider someone outside your workplace.)
• What are my options for dealing with this conflict? (Try to come up with several even if they seem difficult.)
• What are two steps I might take to move forward?

Recognizing how a conflict is impacting you as well as identifying your options can shift your perception of it. You may find that paradoxically, if you face right into the conflict, you will avoid the ineffective and unnecessary struggle that comes from ignoring it.

Transitions by their very nature make anyone feel less secure about some aspect of their life. But even in the midst of a transition that has you feeling lost and afloat in a sea of unknowns, you can regain your bearings and get grounded.

If you constantly focus on what is unclear or confusing in your life, you’re likely to become frustrated and anxious. While it is common to ponder perplexing questions, it can be counterproductive to dwell on those that do not have obvious or immediate answers. Consider why in the following line from a poem by the German poet, Rilke:

“…Do not now seek the answers which cannot be
given to you, because you would not be able to live them.”

Instead of dwelling on the unknown, consider the exercise of focusing your attention on those aspects of your life about which you are certain and clear—these are your “life anchors”. They can be as concrete as naming the people whom you love and who support you, where you want to live, and the specific job you seek, or as abstract as “I want to wake up looking forward to work.” From this exercise, create a list of your anchors and let it be a work in progress, writing additions as they occur to you throughout the day.

Taking the exercise a step further, begin to integrate your awareness of your anchors into your daily routine. As you awake on any given day and before you rise from bed, remind yourself of what you are certain in your life. Accept your response, whether simple or detailed, without judgment. As you rise and your feet touch the floor, breathe deeply several times in recognition of these certainties. Your anchors will have a grounding effect on your life as you reflect on what is true and real, especially when you lack clarity about other things. In doing this, you’ll be aligned with Rilke’s guidance as you honor the flow of your life’s path:

“…Live the questions now.
Perhaps you will gradually, without noticing it,
Live along some distant day, into the answers.” –Rilke